“I’m just cooking!”
What a simple phrase. An explanation of what process you are involved in the current moment. And, when placed in the heart of a scenario - it reveals an “aha"! Let’s go with this.
I was reading a post from Karl Bryan - SixFigure Coach Magazine, episode Day 827: Scarcity. Urgency. Frameworks. Karl is a voracious “stream of consciousness” writer who shares his tips about the business of coaching … and shares other non-coaching related tidbits. The following is one of those gems. While visiting Italy, his uncle’s girlfriend is making dinner and he’s hit with the idea of a smoke alarm that shuts off when you yell, “I’m just cooking” (as he is waving a towel for her!). Yes! Of course, we all want one.
“I’m just cooking” in this context become a command for the smoke detector to reframe the situation. In the realm of the human mind, this phrase enables us to shut down the alarm. No need for that super-sensitive amygdala to think “fight, flight, or freeze?” Reframing is that remarkable ability that allows us as individuals to change how we perceive the world around us.
From the lens of the alarm, the indicator of smoke alerts us to the possibility of fire. The reframe however informs: “Spatula in hand. I’ve got this. This is how I cook. All is well.” But wait. Reframing is a psychological process and the smoke detector is incapable of this human ability. And yet, it does ignite a transformation in our mind from a unfavorable outcome to just being a natural part of the process. Sometimes making things gets messy, challenging, and almost alarming. And that’s just fine. Part of the journey. Putting a picture in a new frame.
Reframing is not limited to external circumstances. Our internal self-perceptions can be reframed as well. An example for your considering, this blog post. I recently left my corporate position to pursue the creativity of my namesake company. Is there doubt, imposter syndrome, and perfectionism riding in the back seat of my car? You bet! However, I am exercising my reframing muscles to perceive these as gifts. What? Yes!
From": “I doubt that this is ready for any one to read.” —-> To: “I am building the necessary skills and learning in the process!”
From: “I am an imposter - thinking that I have expertise.” —-> To: “I am a continuous learner and this is an opportunity to build expertise, experience, and community!”
From: “This is not perfect, it still needs work.” —-> To: “This is not perfect, yet. And, it doesn’t need to be!”
Let’s be very clear that reframing is not wishful thinking. It is a brave act that we gift to ourselves. Let’s acknowledge that it requires courage to look at our selves and admit our biases and activate a fearless flip to a positive, aspirational state. It takes sheer will to change the story. And everyone has the ability to do this. Do it. And then bask in the feeling of moving yourself forward.
So … here is my first blog. And, I’m proud to say … “I’m just cooking!”